Wednesday, April 24, 2013

So yeah....

I have something to blog about.....yea yea I know, it's about time....

So a while back I had another blog that I had started when I broke my leg just to talk or vent or whatever. So I had wrote about something that had happened at home...let me recap.

Bear and a friend were over and decided to walk the big dog.  They walked outside with him and the FIL was outside with his 2 puppies on one line and they pulled him over.  He proceeded to yell at Bear and her friend and then the MIL came out to yell some too.  So I posted that and the fact that I was mad about it because it isn't like they did it on purpose and that no one really likes her and that is the reason that the SIL AND BIL don't come by that much. <--  that's it no names no addresses nothing that you would be able to tell who I am speaking about. 

A couple of days later I received a email about not wanting to be dragged into our fight and that they didn't appreciate the fact I was talking about family on the internet and a whole bunch of nothing.  So I apologized and deleted the blog. <----DELETED MY BLOG!!!!  Didn't matter they came over the following day and told my MIL to go to the site and not only that....they printed the damn thing out!!!  WTF!!!!

So she wrote me a while back...

Hey ROAORM

Hope you are doing well and your leg is finally healed 100%

I was hoping to talk to you in person but that opportunity has not arisen.  I know a lot of stuff happened last year.  I really hope that we can come to a place where we can enjoy family gatherings and events together.  Life is short and it has it's ups and downs so I hope we can make it an up time again.

We don't have to be best pals or anything but I think we should work at being family because at the end of the day that is what matters and it's important for the kids to see that.

No matter what, know that if y'all needed me, even in bad times, I would be there for you even though the relationship was strained.

Hopefully I will see you at Easter.  We don't have to talk about this anymore unless you want to. 

xoxo
 SIL


I responded with...

I am not sure how to respond.

Back when BIL wrote me that you didn't want your name in on my blog or to be dragged into he middle I said Sorry and deleted the blog. You both responded by deleting and blocking me again. That was uncalled for I think after I had said Sorry and deleted the blog.

I have been avoiding family gatherings because I didn't want to be "shunned" again like I was at Christmas that one year.

I am Sorry but I am still not sure that I Will be going. I Will let someone know.

Thanks


She responded with ....

Thanks for responding.

Just for the record, some actions are not automatically fixed with an I'm sorry unfortunately.  And, deleting a blog does not make everyone forget that it happened.

This was a big one ROAORM.  The FB/social media has gotten out of hand. Just cause we aren't FB friends doesn't mean that we are not family.  This is insane.  We need to live outside of the social media world - especially when it comes to matters related to family.  That time that you were home injured with your leg I think was very hurtful to you and I get it....the computer was the only thing you thought you had. I just think playing out your life on the internet/social media is not healthy for you, your family or the rest of the people in your life/family.

Let's find a way to move forward -- it may take some time, but it can be done.  There are a lot of family things going on like Other BIL and Future SIL wedding, Uncle and Future Aunt wedding, family coming down from Minnesota and Chicago.  We all want you guys to be a part of it.  These times do not come around again. 

Hope what I said did not make matters worse.  It was not written with malice or ill will.  It is what I would have told you in person if I had the opportunity.

Have a great day/rest of the week and I hope to see you guys SOON.


And again...



Well I was unaware that anyone other than you two knew about the blog. Like I had said when I wrote BIL back, it had only had a couple views.  HUBS and will be there for the weddings and the family coming down from where ever, but we would like to stay out of all other drama.  Yes, you did hurt me when you all deleted and blocked me from my only way of seeing anything at the time. 
 
Last one...
 
ROAORM...everyone that was friends with you on FB got the alert to read your blog because the alert came across FB. Neither BIL nor I knew you ever had a blog if it were not for the postings on FB advertising it.  Your blog was tied to FB.  The problem is everyone was reading your blog posts and it sounds like BIL was the only one that said anything after that final blog post.

There are other ways to keep in touch with your family.  If you didn't have a phone you could have emailed or written, come over to the house etc.  Social media is not the only tool to communicate.

With that said, I am happy to hear you will be attending the family functions.  I truly believe it's a step in the right direction.   As far as good news, there really hasn't been any drama at all since this event -- at least that I know of.  No family, friendship, relationship is drama free.  It's all in how you handle it.  You can intensify the fire or you can work to put it out.

If nothing else at least we are communicating and not via FB - Awesome.

You still have my number right?   Here it is just in case you want to talk in person.

 ***-***-****

 SIL
 
 
Ok so I don't really want to email you what makes you think that I would want to call your ass!!??  *sigh*
 
So what are your thoughts?  I feel that I am no longer in the wrong after I had apologized and deleted the blog.  It doesn't stop there though!
 
At Christmas this past year the Hubs and the kids went to their house and was ignored by them.  Their family didn't speak to them.  That is what I didn't want happening, that is the reason that I didn't want to go or to be around them at all.  I never in a million years think that they would treat my kids or husband like that.  They are supposed to be BIG christen people that go to church all of the time and believe in forgiveness but they don't act like a christen person is supposed to act.  I don't know what to think. 
 
Lawd have mercy!!!! 

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