My Luck

So I don’t know if you all remember that I had great news a while back?

Well the person that bought my Charlie from me was going to sell him back to me. 

She called my mom and told her that she could no longer take care of him and needed to sell him.  So my mom called me and asked me if I wanted to buy him for $300.00 from Monica Cooper? 

OMG!  Yes I am wanting him back!!  Have you been in an accident and gotten amnesia?  Give me a couple of days to get everything together and I will call you back. 

 

So that was two weeks ago that we had that conversation.  We have had many in between there mostly about when I was going to be able to go and get him.  I am/was in the process of getting our fence up so that we can have all of our horses in the same pasture.  That takes time and money, but, we were finishing it up this coming weekend and I would be able to come and get him this coming week.  I had even went as far as telling my SD that if she needs feed or hay for him to let me know and I will bring it by so that she wouldn’t have to worry about him.  He called a few hours after that and told me that she said that she just needs him gone.  OH.  Ok. 

About a week later I saw in our little paper that some woman with grey short hair and a grey trailer had dropped of two horses at a stable and one of them were in horrific condition!  OMG how could anyone do that?  Why wouldn’t you just try your damnedest to find them a place to live before starving them like that?!  A couple of days after that I got a call from my mom that Monica had dropped off Charlie with a lady that has several (15) acre’s and that when I am ready that I need to go and get him from there. 

Flash forward to today.  I am writing this with such a heavy heart.  That was my Charlie that was in the paper.  I am beside myself.  Why!? Why did she not just call and say please just come and get him.  I cannot feed him.  My Charlie passed away that same day he was dropped off.  My Charlie will never be mine again.  I am so deeply hurt!  So hurt! 

I want her sentenced to life of near starvation EVERY FUCKING DAY!!!  Look at my horse!!!  WHY!!!
 

Here is his ending :'(

Some more...

About Me!  You want to know more about me?! 

Ok so No one really wants to know more about me but I am Stealing this off of Humble's page because I thought it was cute!  If she finds out and is upset over it I will kindly take it down, but come on.......

So here is a little more about me.....


1. Where were you born?  Houston, Texas

2. Were you named after someone? I was told that I was names after my Aunt that passed when she was 11 years old...

3. How many children do you have?  Two..Bear 14 y/o and Bubba 11 y/o

4. How many pets do you have?  2 Horses, 3 dogs, and 1 cat

5. Your worst injury? My Recently broken leg...OH That was a bitch to overcome..I also 14 years ago went through 27 hours of labor with the eldest...

6. Do you have a special talent? No...not that I know of...I can go from sweet and innocent to your worst nightmare in about 2 seconds flat.
7. Favorite thing to bake? Nothing I hate baking....I love to cook!  If it is something that I have never cooked before that is even better!!! (NOT BAKING)

8. Favorite Fast Food? I really like Sonic, but recent events have made it more difficult to have here lately...

9. Would you bungee jump? No! NO! FUCK NO!  I DON'T LIKE TO BE HIGH IN THE AIR AND HAVE THE CHANCE OF MY FAT ASS FALLING AND MAKING A BIG BOOM!!!

10. What is the first thing you notice about people?  Eyes...Teeth <-- That's funny because my teeth are not perfect and that is one of the first things I notice...

11. When was the last time you cried?  Every night!  Over my long lost Charlie!!!  :(

 12. Any current worries? My kids will not grow up to be everything that they dream of ( or that I dream of them being)

13. Name 3 drinks you drink regularly. Coffee, Dr Pepper, Chocolate Milk.

14. What’s your favorite book?  I don't have a favorite one.  I will read almost anything!

15. Would you like to be a pirate? OMG to be able to say "WALK THEE PLANK MAITY!" Would be epic!

16. Favorite Smells? Fresh cut grass, a clean man, Snuggle (the blue one) Spring!
17. Why do you blog?  Mostly to vent.  I don't really have any 'girlfriends' because I am a bitch and because once I make a friend I expect it to last forever and I am really dissapointed when something happens and it doesn't...

18. What song do you want played at your funeral?   Humm...I have never really thought about.  Something off the wall maybe.  How about Wild thang for when people are coming in to sit down! <--EPIC! <--(New word)  Then just so I know everyone will be crying, Live like you were Dying...

19. What is your least favorite thing about yourself? That I speak my mind ALL THE TIME!  I can't seem to keep my mouth shut!

20. Favorite hobby? Well right now it is my garden and I am trying to get some chickens...That is bound to change though, give me a few weeks!

21. Name Something you’ve done, you never thought you would do? Have kids. 

22. What do you look for in a friend? Loyalty, Won't stand you up, Will listen and not always think that the world revolves around them, Not a drug user (sorry), There is alo.t How about I blog about it :)

23. Favorite fun things to do?  Spend time outside (when it's cool enough) Used to be ride my horses...

24. Pet peeves?  Moving anything in my house!  Please don't touch my shit!  Cussing around small kids that are not yours.  Talking on the phone at a resturant.  Putting words in my mouth <--Seriously, don't do that!  Trying to get me to change my views on Pro-whatever!  NO!

25. What’s the last thing that made you laugh? I sure it was something I saw on FB!

Ok So that was a little on me!  Hope you enjoyed it! 

FAMILY

Family is a funny thing, isn’t it?

Some love you so much that you feel they are smothering you…

Some could care less if you fell from a bridge a week ago and they haven’t heard from you!

Mine is a little mixed…

My family could care less about one another is the way I feel most of the time.  Some of that could be the depression talking but most of it is true.  I have a strange family.  The last time we were al together my sister refused to talk to my grandma because she couldn’t fly to Ohio for her wedding.  I on the other hand have started talking to my whole family again and you really couldn’t even tell.  I feel like no one really cares about me.  I feel like if I were to pass away tomorrow the only ones that would morn my death would be my husband and my kids.  Let me tell you a little bit…..

 

(NOTICE)  THE FOLLOWING WILL GET ME YELLED AT IF EVER SEEN BY MY MOTHER…

 

I have always felt like I was not loved.  My mother did not tell us she loved us until I was in my 30’s.  My mother blamed me for her depression after my dad was sent away.  Me, because I couldn’t stand living with my grandpa, and spent most of my time away from there.  She thinks that I should have spent every waking moment making sure she was ok.  I was 14.  I can remember standing at the screen door at maybe age 4 or 5 and crying because she left for work.  I can remember always feeling that I was adopted and the disappointment in finding out I wasn’t…ßsad right?  I don’t know why she was like this.  All I do know is I have fought tooth and nail to NOT be like her!!!  

She let her husband kick us out of our home of 7 years because he needed an office…I didn’t speak to her for 3 years after that.  Then the Charlie thing happened and I thought “GOD, why did I come back!!!”  While I was mad at her my grandma said some things that she will deny till the day she dies and I missed my Aunt Jackie’s Funeral…L   ß  I miss her! 

 

On the other hand my MIL smothers us.  She bought us a house…ßgreat right ‘sigh’…I wish.  She bought it so we could stay next to her F-O-R-E-V-E-R!  J  She isn’t so bad (most of the time) ….

 

I am posting all of this because my sister is Pregnant.  She went to find the sex today.  She hasn’t called me yet.  HER MIL POSTED THE SEX ON FB!  I am just a depressed bitch is all.  Believe it or not I am not even PMSing!  Lol….. 

My Charlie :(

This is just a random blog because I am a little depressed tonight. 

I really miss my horse.  He was my horse and that bastard sold him and didn't even have to balls to tell me, he had my mom do it! 

I cry almost every night because of this horse.  I love him.  I know who he sold him to but I am not able to contact her because she is a cop that has threatened me already and I just really don't want to start anything again with her.  Yes I said again, because I have started something with her before because she got snarly with me about the whole situation.  She didn't think I had any right to be upset with my mom or the bastard about selling him...

One week before he sold him to her for $350.00 he asked me if I wanted him for $650.00.  (yes this is my mothers husband)  I SAID YES I DID!  My mom told me to wait that she wouldn't let him sell the horse and she would get him to come down on the price.  Yeah OK....

Charlie

THEY SOLD HIM ONE WEEK LATER!  THEY SOLD HIM TO A LADY THAT HAS STARVED HER HORSES BEFORE!

I am still broken :( 
I am still hurt
I am still wanting
I am still....

I want him back
I cry nightly because of this
I can't believe that family would do this
I will never forget this
I will hurt until I find him
I am crying now...

I need to find him
I want him back
Please help me
Please! I am begging
He was my world
I love him :'(