My Aunt!

Today November 15, 2013 the world lost a very special person.  My aunt Tina Lynn was born September 12, 1957 to my Grandparents.  She was a very important person to all that knew her.  She was a loving and funny person that tried to not judge you unless of course you were being pissy with her or someone that she loved.  My mom and Grandma used to tell me stories of her being kicked off of the bus for fighting.  Guess she never grew out of it…  J 

She was ecstatic the day she found out she was pregnant.  Then she came down from Nacogdoches to visit Grandma and the rest of us and low and behold she went into labor early.  Guess he just didn’t want to be born in the boon docks lol….I remember going and seeing him in the NICU.  He was so small, like a pound or so and he had what looked like a brown cupcake on the top of his head.  We laughed hard at that. 

Couple years later, I went to stay with her for a few weeks so I could go to band camp.  She had an old beat up VW bus.  Oh it was horrid, but it got me to camp and town ok so off we would go…

She had some down time too, but I won’t remember those now. 

She lived with us for a few a long time ago.  She dated a body builder who thought that he was god’s gift to women.  ß He surely was not, but she liked him at the time.  There were so many more that I could write but I would love to hear about yours of my Aunt, my mom’s sister, my Grandma and Grandpa’s 3^rd born daughter. 

She will so be missed by me, by my mom, by my grandma and grandpa, by so many people.  Lord help us all if we ever try to forget her though, I have a feeling that she will come down and so something to jolt our memories if we do.  J  How could you forget, her.  She was, after all the life of the party and we will miss her so so so very much.  SO MUCH!  

I <3 you TT……..

My kinda dreamin'

Hey you guys.  Can I just say that I have some pretty crazy dreams. 

Last night I dreamed that I was a super-natural killer.  <---I know right.  I think that I was the leader or something because we had a meeting about all of the supers that were in the area and I was the one holding the meeting.

Anyways, when I went to search for them in this town my grandma Mary (who has passed) was with me and some little girl.  She was talking about how she loves her grandchildren and that while we were killing these things she didn't want anything to happen.

So I had to do something and we dropped off the little girl to basically fend for herself and we drove on.  When we got out of the car and started walking she started asking things like how were her puppies and some other things that are starting to fade.  Then a big werewolf looking thing walked up to us  and shined a VERY BRIGHT light in our faces and I realized that my light in my room was on and that means that it was time to get up..........

Damnit!  I hate it when that happens! 

Oh he found you huh! F***** great!!

So how have y'all been? 
    Good?

Well I have a little something to say and I can tell ya that when I first found out I was beyond pissed. 

A while back I went to Ohio to visit a friend and my sister.  Well two days before I left my daughters biological father contacted her through her friend. 

To some of you, you're thinking well what is wrong with that?  I am going to tell you what the problem is.  He hasn't had anything to do with her since she was born.  At one point he made the comment that she wasn't his.  He left 2 months after she was born to be with someone that was 4 years younger than me.  I was 18 and he was 20.  Yea! 

So 2 days before I left he contacted her.  She of course didn't say anything to either me or her dad.  <----Mertis.  She let it go for quite a while.  Until well after I had gotten back.  She was calling and talking to him the whole time!  He has filled her head with all kinds of crap.  Like for instance; I have always wanted to meet you; or I pay child support; or your mom has kept you away from me (well that is kinda true but he is a dope head and I wanted nothing to do with him); or, and this is my favorite, let me tell you all of the things that your mom did when she was a teen. 

BASTARD!!!!!

HOW DARE YOU CONTACT THE CHILD THAT I HAVE RAISED FOR THE PAST 15 YEARS AND TELL HER LIES SO SHE MAY LIKE YOU!!!! THEN TURN THE TABLES AND MAKE IT SEEM LIKE YOU HAVE BEEN THE PERFECT PERSON AND THAT YOU HAVE PAID CHILD SUPPORT AND BEEN LOOKING FOR HER FOR THE PAST 15 FUCKING YEARS!!!!!  YOU HAVE NOT DONE ANY OF THAT!  I HAVEN'T SEEN A DIME FROM YOU IN I CAN'T EVEN REMEMBER HOW LONG.  YOU HAVE BEEN LOOKING FOR HER?  REALLY?  WELL MY GRANDMA HAS LIVED IN THE SAME HOUSE FR 30+ YEARS!  HAVE YOU GONE THERE LOOKING FOR HER?  NO ASS, YOU HAVEN'T!!!!

Pfft, please tell us all another lie.  I had to sit MY child down and explain to her the reason why she wasn't allowed to speak to your ass! 
         1. you are an addict that can't stay away from the drugs!
         2. you have failed to raise the other 6 kids that you have!
         3. you are a pathological liar!
         4. you are a worthless piece of trash that only looks out for himself!
         5. you have yet to keep a job!
         6. you are in jail more than you are out of it!

Damn I could go on and on and on!!!  Please find one of your other kids to try and love.  Stay the hell away from the one that I am almost done with!

I really hate the deadbeats that think that because she is 15, and she is so close to graduating from High School and moving on to college that you can just step back in and be "a part of her life" now!  Screw you!  She is the product of me and my husband knowing what love is and knowing how to show a child that love and support!  She is not a product of you and your lying cheating ways!  You are a worthless piece of trash that is to scared to contact me to talk to her!  Instead you have to drag two 15 year olds into your fucked up world! 

Being a parent is hard y'all.  

Two for one is not always cool.

I feel like I have been socked in the stomach.  You all know that my BFF is sick and I am totally afraid of losing her.  Now it has finally hit me that I am not only going to lose her but I am also losing my Aunt.

Tina and her Mean doggy

 I love my aunt as much as I love my mom.
 She was the fun aunt.
 She was the one that you would go to if you were in trouble or wanted to get into trouble.

I was asked today by my mom if I could go with her and find something that we can lay her to "sleep" in forever.  She kinda caught me off guard.  Isn't that something that her son is supposed to do?  I am going to have to help my mom and my grandma plan a funeral for a daughter, sister, mom, aunt, and friend to so many.  So many that haven't seen her since she got sick.

My husband asked me tonight why we were having a closed casket?  Well because if someone wanted to see her they should have given her the respect to see her now when it counts.  I for one don't want people coming in and gawking at her when she is finally at peace.  No one goes to see her now.  My mom, my grandma, me, and sometimes when he can my uncle.  Her son has came down to see her twice in two years.  He doesn't care about anything but getting his grubby little hands on what she has left.

My Aunt Tina and Cousin Kelly.

I don't know if I will be able to do any of this sober.  I pray that I can but as I write this I am falling apart.  I am so very scared of losing her and T.G. at the same time.  I don't think that as strong of a person that I am that I will be ok after that.

My aunt when I was around 16 thought that it would be funny to come up to my cousin's room with some wild turkey and give me and Christi a shot of it.  Wow that was some nasty shit.  She was also the one that let me stay with her during the summer of 94' when I went to band camp at SFA.  If she wouldn't have let me stay with her I wouldn't have been able to go.  Thank you TT for being there for me and showing me that sometimes you just have to have a little fun in life and let go.



She is and always will be my Aunt TT....... </3  My heart is breaking.  Mostly for her and the fact that she has no visitors...none.  It is sad that the end of her days and she will be spending them alone.   

My friend wants to leave and I don't think it's fair....

Can I just say that I am scared that I am going to lose my friend...

I don't want to lose her but I don't want her to live the way that she is having to live.  I will so miss our talks and such and her dreams of going here and stealing stuff ;) 

Is it bad for me to say this? 

                                                    I DON'T WANT TO LOOSE HER!  

She is important to me, her son, her husband, and several other people.  It's not fair.

That's all...............................  goodnight .....................GP SUX

Ohio Part 3.....

This week we visit with my sister and her husband. yay...

Can I just say that although I love my sister I probably will never go to visit with her again. 

I went up there on a budget, very strict budget that they knew about.  Yet I was still expected to purchase everything that we would be eating for the week.  Like milk and bottled water.  Then when we went out to eat I also had to purchase that.  So needless to say we didn't go anywhere because I didn't have the money to do so. 

I had a blast hanging out with my sister and my newest nephew though. 








We took a lot of really cute photo's of him but they sleep all the time, because, well,  he is new and he sleeps a lot so Booboo sleeps with him.......


We did go to Pennsylvania one day to go and see some fish but as soon as we crossed the Pa. Oh border it started to rain, hard, so we came back and went to the in-laws to watch a Browns game.

On our way!!

 
 Of course Matty falls asleep as soon as we get into the car...

On the second to last day we were there we became awesome like auntie and I had to take a few pictures.....


All in all I had fun.  On the way back in Tenn, where by the way they should clean up their highways, we hit a large piece of metal in the road and hurt my truck.  I didn't think that we would make it home, but we did where my husband and animals were happy to see me and my daughter was happy to see her bubba!!!  I would highly recommend you taking at least one road trip with one, just one of your kids to get to know them.  We had fun just the two of us....maybe I will do it again next year but with bear........

HELLO OHIO.....part 2

Ok guys, we got of at 6am like I said we would.  Went to the stroe to get ice and of course Coby has to fall on the sidewalk like a goober.  After that we are

O
    F
        F !!!

It took forever to drive the first day, and the second was I felt longer but we finally made it to O-E-OoooO..hhhhi...ooo! 

Our first stop there was to see my friend T.G.  I think her son was more happy to see my though because he ran up to me and almost jumped into my arms, but after that I got out of the truck and gave T.G. a hug.  Yay!!!

We will again go by the days.

Day 1 -  (Sunday) Uneventful.  When I got there we sat and visited for a few and then we had to run to the store.  OHH and we got T.G. Homemade Spaghetti.  OMG it was Delish!!!!

Day 2 - (Monday) Didn't get much sleep....THEY WAKE UP AT 6am!!!  ARGGGG!!!!  Ok I'm up!  So, anyhow, T.G. had a doctor appointment so I had to stay with the boys, who by the way didn't get up until 8am. :/  Yea.  When they got back we had to do some more running around and I was not feeling very well.  We went to a place called "The Barn" (Amish like restaurant).  It was surprisingly good.  Later in the day T.G. and I went and ran some errands without the boys.  It was fun just having "girl time".   Oh and don't let her tell you that she doesn't eat leftovers because on day 2 we had leftover sketti's.

Day 3 - (Tuesday) She had another doctor appointment today but didn't wake me until later.  She took me to see the McKinney monument. Later we went to the auction #1.  I love auctions!  I have always loved auctions.  T.G. got me an oil lamp for like $8!!!  I lub it!

Day 4 - (Wednesday) Camping day!!  The most fun one will have is to go camping with me!
  I talked T.G. into going tubing down the river that is in the park, can I just stop right there, Ohio water is a lot colder than ours in Texas.  On with the story, we went and got our tubes and proceeded down to the water, C (her son) did not want to do this and looking back I see why.  As I step into the water I am instantly frozen!!  That water is so freakin cold!  I am a trooper and I continue on like there is nothing wrong.  C on the other hand has no problem telling him mom that this isn't a good idea.  We no sooner get into the water and begin floating and T.G. gets hung up on a log with C.  Great!  I have no way of helping them, but she frees them.  Away we go and all is going well for a while and then all hell breaks loose!  C falls out of the tube!  Yep and freaks the hell out mostly because the water is so cold because he can stand, the water in this part is only about 2 feet deep.  We get him back on and continue down the river when I find out the T.G. was so scared that she (forgive me) Shat!  hahahahaha!!!    <-----I am rolling in my tube laughing!!!!!!!!!!!!!  Anyways no we didn't finish the river....but the rest of the day was great! The boys rode Go-carts...for C it was the first time!!

Day 5 - (Thursday) So we packed up and left so we could make it to the Amish auction that night because I have heard that the Amish auctioneer has a HAWT ASS!!!  I shall never know because he was  a no show!  DAMNIT!

Day 6 - (Friday) Spent the whole day cleaning and then we went to get our hair done afterwards.  (sorry T.G. I just didn't like that blond blob in the front of my head)

Day 7 - (Saturday) I will never NEVER EVER come up again during the "super bowl hall of fame" parade day!  She made us get up at 2:30am!!!!   Just so we could go and sit out in the rain and cold and wait for a parade to start!!  The after party was great though!  Good food and good times! 

Day 8 - Kinda bittersweet because we were having to leave but I think it was about time.  I am sure that we were wearing on their nerves and as sweet as C can be he was starting to wear on mine.  So we packed it up and headed a little further north.....Watch out Booboo here we come........