Two for one is not always cool.

I feel like I have been socked in the stomach.  You all know that my BFF is sick and I am totally afraid of losing her.  Now it has finally hit me that I am not only going to lose her but I am also losing my Aunt.

Tina and her Mean doggy

 I love my aunt as much as I love my mom.
 She was the fun aunt.
 She was the one that you would go to if you were in trouble or wanted to get into trouble.

I was asked today by my mom if I could go with her and find something that we can lay her to "sleep" in forever.  She kinda caught me off guard.  Isn't that something that her son is supposed to do?  I am going to have to help my mom and my grandma plan a funeral for a daughter, sister, mom, aunt, and friend to so many.  So many that haven't seen her since she got sick.

My husband asked me tonight why we were having a closed casket?  Well because if someone wanted to see her they should have given her the respect to see her now when it counts.  I for one don't want people coming in and gawking at her when she is finally at peace.  No one goes to see her now.  My mom, my grandma, me, and sometimes when he can my uncle.  Her son has came down to see her twice in two years.  He doesn't care about anything but getting his grubby little hands on what she has left.

My Aunt Tina and Cousin Kelly.

I don't know if I will be able to do any of this sober.  I pray that I can but as I write this I am falling apart.  I am so very scared of losing her and T.G. at the same time.  I don't think that as strong of a person that I am that I will be ok after that.

My aunt when I was around 16 thought that it would be funny to come up to my cousin's room with some wild turkey and give me and Christi a shot of it.  Wow that was some nasty shit.  She was also the one that let me stay with her during the summer of 94' when I went to band camp at SFA.  If she wouldn't have let me stay with her I wouldn't have been able to go.  Thank you TT for being there for me and showing me that sometimes you just have to have a little fun in life and let go.



She is and always will be my Aunt TT....... </3  My heart is breaking.  Mostly for her and the fact that she has no visitors...none.  It is sad that the end of her days and she will be spending them alone.   

Ohio Part 3.....

This week we visit with my sister and her husband. yay...

Can I just say that although I love my sister I probably will never go to visit with her again. 

I went up there on a budget, very strict budget that they knew about.  Yet I was still expected to purchase everything that we would be eating for the week.  Like milk and bottled water.  Then when we went out to eat I also had to purchase that.  So needless to say we didn't go anywhere because I didn't have the money to do so. 

I had a blast hanging out with my sister and my newest nephew though. 








We took a lot of really cute photo's of him but they sleep all the time, because, well,  he is new and he sleeps a lot so Booboo sleeps with him.......


We did go to Pennsylvania one day to go and see some fish but as soon as we crossed the Pa. Oh border it started to rain, hard, so we came back and went to the in-laws to watch a Browns game.

On our way!!

 
 Of course Matty falls asleep as soon as we get into the car...

On the second to last day we were there we became awesome like auntie and I had to take a few pictures.....


All in all I had fun.  On the way back in Tenn, where by the way they should clean up their highways, we hit a large piece of metal in the road and hurt my truck.  I didn't think that we would make it home, but we did where my husband and animals were happy to see me and my daughter was happy to see her bubba!!!  I would highly recommend you taking at least one road trip with one, just one of your kids to get to know them.  We had fun just the two of us....maybe I will do it again next year but with bear........

Poo poo in the potty!!! by LO

Have you ever had one of those days or shall I say moments that you wish you could crawl under a rock and live there forever?  Yea!  Well let me tell you a story that I was told the other day.


We shall call her LO. 

Lo came over last night and we were just hanging out on the couch watching Tv and talking.  Making fun of people that we should never make fun of and just having a blast....

She looks over at me later in the night and says "I have to tell you what happened the other night when me and (Cece)<--fake name- went to this party of a girl that she knows."

                 The following is a true story told to me by LO.

"So I was sitting at this party and I had to go, you know #2.  Yea so I excused myself and I went into the bathroom to do my business.  After I was done and I had tried to flush, IT WOULD NOT FLUSH!  I was mortified."

Now y'all at this point I had to ask, "Was it because it was too much for the toilet to handle?"  (LMAO)!!! 

LO says, "No, it had no water in the tank.  So I started to look around the bathroom to try and find something so I could put more water into the tank and all I found was a small cup that you would us to rinse your mouth with!"

(more laughing)  (LO is rolling her eyes and Laughing)

She continues, "I didn't know what to do and if I stayed in there any longer they were going to think that I was constipated!  So I went out, closed the door, calmly walked into the living room and told Cece that to come here please.  She looked at me and said 'What's wrong?'  Please come with me.  Please!!  She stood up and followed me into the bathroom looked at me and said 'Ok so what is wrong?'  OMG the toilet won't flush.  She looked at me and said, 'Don't ever think that I don't love you!' She then picked up the cup and started to put water in the tank while saying 'ya, know, if you were thinking you would have taken all of that stuff out of the metal tub over there and used that to put water in to fill this up, then you wouldn't have needed me!'  Geez......"

Oh the stuff that we lady's put up with.  A man would have walked out and shouted..

DAMN!  Who left that pile in the bathroom??

Then walk away like it wasn't him...

Have you had anything embarrassing happen like that to you??  I wanna hear about it in the comments........

Parenting

So I sit here and I think...What can I tell y'all this week that will just blow you away?  Guess what?  I have nothing!  Nada, Zilch, not a damn thing and I am pissed about that!  So because you were so sweet to come and see what type of gibberish I have wrote about this week I will have to improvise...

My parenting style...I am forewarning you that it may disturb you the way I parent...I am blunt with my kids.  If I get pissed at them, they will know it because I will be screaming, yelling, cussing, and everything else.  Now before you get your panties in a wad let me just say that they stand there and look at me when I am doing this with a smile on their face.  They know that I am throwing empty threats, so calm your tits! 

I am also very open with them about life.  If they ask me a question that makes me uncomfortable, well I just muscle through it and tell it like it really is.  Which kinda has back fired on me because they are also very open with me.  My daughter quite often tells me shit that I would rather not know, and my son thinks that it is cute to tell me how many 'hairs' he has down there!  AAHHHHHHH!!!!!  I really don't need to know that.

I think I am a good parent.  If you tell me any different I will hurt you.  I am the type of parent that my MIL calls a 'momma bear' because if you mess with my babies I WILL HURT YOU!   Seriously.  I don't play like that...Those are my kids and I will protect them with everything in me.  My kids are the main reason me and the MIL fight.  She doesn't think that I should protect them as much as I do.  She thinks that she should be able to come out and tell them what to do with me sitting there.  PFFT......

I don't let my kids go anywhere unless I do a child predator check first in that area.  If by chance (this has happened) I arrive at the house and I don't like the way it looks.  Be prepared to be royally embarrassed because I will leave!  Bear, the whole way home says "OMG MOM YOU HAVE RUINED MY LIFE FOREVER!!!"  Have I ruined you life because I think I may have just made it to where my daughter will graduate and do great in life...Bear has 2 good friends...That being said, they are a year younger than her(she was held back) and both of them are on birth control!  It isn't because they need to regulate their periods...NO it is because they are having sex, REGULARLY!!!!  Hello, good momma, right here!  My child is not having sex yet, WHEW!  Oh how do I know you ask?  Because she can't go anywhere!  That and I know that she would tell me or her dad <again we are an open family)...Her one friend's parents will bring her over to see her boyfriend, who lives one street over from us, but won't bring her here.  Strange right?!  Makes me think that they want her to have sex.

Now my sister, I love her, but lord help her style of parenting.  I cannot tell you how many times she has called me saying something like 'M HELP, HOW DO YOU GET _________________(fill in with some type of creamy liquid) out of (hair, carpet, clothes, walls, ect.....)  Now you could say that she needs to watch her kids better......(you could say it, it's ok)  I do find humor in it though.  I would spend hours laughing afterwards... 

Her youngest would get onto the counter tops and pull out all of the dishes from the cabinet.  Good thing they were plastic.   I can't parent like that....

I guess you could say that I am an average parent, but I am sure that if I wasn't 17 when I had my first and I had waited until late 20's or so I would have been superb!  Yeah probably not, but hey!

What is your style of parenting?

Dog Shaming?

 

Bad Boy!

 

Ok so if you follow me on Facebook you will know that I have posted a photo of my dog when we got home.   I had never heard of dog shaming before like 2 weeks ago and I have been itching to get just on photo of one of my dogs so I could shame them...(does that make me a bad dog parent).   Eh I don't care because it is freaking hilarious!!!!  I am now in love with it and cannot wait until the next time, and there will be a next time.  I have several things that they could be shamed for like when Riley ate my Panties.  Yep I have to hid them!  He will go into the laundry hamper and eat them, I mean eat there are no pieces left for evidence just a hole in the crotch...is it wrong that we hang them around his neck when he does it?  Cause when I see it I am so pissed it is the only thing I can do at the moment.  Then he acts like I am doing it for no reason and walks around like I should feel bad for him because he has a pair of stinking panties around his neck...PFFT!!!!  You, mister, shouldn't have been eating on them!

I am running low on panties...

I guess all animals do strange things...Both of my dogs will eat the cat poop faster than she can shit it out.   That is uberly gross, and whoever said dogs mouths were cleaner than our must have never seen some of the stuff that they eat.


Well that is all I know about this.  If it happens again I will surely post about it!

Teabags?

OK so lets start off by saying I am a mom, I have been for a little over 14 years. Now lets move on to this story....Grab a tissue it's a good one...

I am in the kitchen on Monday washing dishes (yes I wash dishes alot) and I have Bear(14) put on some water for a pitcher of sweet tea.  When the water starts to boil I say "Go and get the teabags....(My son (10) explodes in laughter).....What the hell is so funny?" 

He tells me "Nothing!"  :/  "Really? Then why are you laughing?"  "I don't know!" 

OK so I am like HUMMMM.........whatever kids are weird...... So I continue "Bear go and get the teabags.........( AGAIN IT HAPPENS).....What the hell Bubba?!"  

(CONTINUES DIEING LAUGHING-He is literally crying he is laughing so hard)...."Bear put them in the pot..." 

Now I am still asking what is so funny buy the word Teabag?  Which then gets laughter not only from the boy but now Bear is laughing!!  WTF is so damn funny???!!!

I go into the bedroom so I can ask Mert.  "Mert do you think it is funny when I say 'teabag'?"  "no"  "They (points to living room) won't stop laughing!"  "Well they are :/ (don't like this word) stupid"
I say "UGH"  and walk out. 

TEA'S DONE!!

"Bear get me the bag of ice so I can fill up the pitcher."  She gets the ice and says nonchalantly "You want me to bang it on the ground?"  OMG!!!  You would have thought that that saying was the funniest thing on the planet!  He (bubba) has fallen off of the couch by now and is rolling laughing!! 

OK so I get that one, and unless your mind is already in the gutter you wouldn't find that funny, but guess what, his mind is there! 

So I have had it at this point and I tell them "Spill it! What is so funny about the word 'teabag'?  tell me NOW!"  (I don't like my kids knowing something that I don't know)

Well they don't tell me they show me.....(their version).......Bear sits on the floor and bubba takes her head and pulls it towards his (UM YEA)!  OMG!  STOP THAT!!  WTF!! 

They are dieing and I am freaking out!  I am told later by LOLO that is not what it means but hey let them believe that! 

I looked it up!  I don't want to do that!!! EVER!!!

teabagging

An adult act performed by consenting republican/conservatives on each other to express their fake outrage to imaginary tax increases (most of these idiots actually just got a tax break) During this act one republican/conservative nut job (pun intended) drops his pants in public and slowly lowers his scrotum into the eager mouth of another right wing nut lover. Some basic Teabagging participation rules 1: Participants have to be very low income (preferably on welfare) 2: Participants have to be avid Fox News watchers (this makes certain the participants are brainwashed to the extent of being borderline retarded) 3: Participants have to be republican/conservative On 04/15/09 (Tax Day) broke ass republicans throughout the country gathered in public and performed mass teabagging on each other for hours while complaining about some imaginary tax increases

ok Hope you enjoyed my unconfortable moment with my kids :)

Am I wrong?

Hey, I missed y'all!  How are my people!?  All 1 of you HAHAHA!!!

Yea, OK we need to catch up a little...

I told you about the crazy horse girl down the street last time?  Well she struck again!  Yep!  I had to feed this morning, and I text her to let her know that I was feeding.  I texted her again to let her know that I was there and ready to feed.  I called and let her know that I wanted to feed before the storm, that I could see coming, started; and that I was going to feed my horses in 5 minutes if she didn't hurry.  She never showed up!  EVER!!!  Let me back up to Friday....

Mert and I fought.  He got pissed at me for something, whatever.  So he left to go and get him something to eat at around 6:30ish.  He gets back around 8ish and asks me if Erin had called (BTW that is crazy horse girl)  Nope, she didn't, why?  He tells me that he just saw them all leave with both trucks both trailers and all 4 of the 4-wheelers.  Huh, that's odd......

About 15-20 minutes later we get the following from Crazy horse girl..."Hey we r going be gone for the weekend garage door is unlock just lift up" word for word....

WTF!!!  I am not your animals keeper!!!!

We had been feeding her horses because they are in the same pasture as mine and I didn't think it would be fair to feed mine and not hers, when she isn't here.  That being said, they have been at his mom's house for the last week and don't come out to feed still.   So they assumed that we had nothing to do this weekend (which we didn't but still) and they TOLD us to basically feed their horses!  Sorry, who in the fuck do you think that you are talking too?!?!?!?  I don't get paid to babysit your animals!   

So that being said, that is why I did what I did this morning, and didn't feed her horses.  At that time because she would not answer me I didn't know if she was at his mom's or not.  It is not my job to keep track of her horses and vice versa.  She informed my 14 year old daughter yesterday that she was not going to allow her horses to eat the hay that we buy anymore.  Oh, really, OK, well I think you may have a problem because I will make sure that my horses have hay and you will pay me if you keep your horses in there, they will be eating that hay unless you sit next to it day and night to guard it.  FUCKING DUMB ASS!!!  I believe that I am doing the right thing by not letting her take advantage of me and my husbands generosity.  Am I wrong?

Le' Sigh!

I am not quite sure that I am "normal"! 

Sure I have a family, dogs, cat, even horses, but does that mean that I am "normal"?

Me like most people wonder stuff.  Kids wonder stuff like 'Why is the sky blue' and 'why is the grass green' but as adults we know the answer to those questions.  I wonder more strange things like is there really life out there?  Do we really go to Heaven or Hell?  Even stuff like why on earth do we as humans have eyebrows?


Do you know any of the answers to those questions?  I mean really know the answer not just what you were told.  I mean really think about it!  If there is life out there do you think we would know about it by now?  Do they really 'visit' us while we sleep?  Why do they wait for us to sleep, come on over why I am awake so I can see your strange ass!  Poke and prod me, Um no thanks! 

Heaven and Hell?  Who's to say that we don't just die?  What if when we die we are just really disappointed because we just stay here?  What if we don't go anywhere we just cease to exist?  I know if you believe in God you should already know the answer to this but haven't you ever doubted that this is what really happens?

What about words?  You know like languages?  Who in the hell sat there one day and said "No I will not grunt anymore when I want something!  From now on I will talk!"  "This will be a wheel and fire and rock and etc......."  Who did that?  They must have been really hated by their community being a smart ass and all! 

If you can or want to try and answer that questions please feel free to comment below!  I would love someone else's perspective on this! 

If you have a question you want answered Lets hear it!!!!!!

To Be (sick) or not to be!

Ok, so, lets just start off by saying I have been sick. I layed in bed all day yesterday sleeping sick, and I only tell you this because if you didn't know that I had been sick well the following would make no sense. 

My House is a disaster! 

I just cleaned it Wednesday! Seriously! Like it was not just an, oh sure come and look at my living room but don't go anywhere else clean, No!  It was, Oh the president wants to come to my house? Sure let me give you the grand tour, clean!  Sadly it is back to its old ways!  I believe that I may have a ghost!  I can clean the house and wake up the next morning and nobody know what happened!  Case in point!
      'Who left this half a glass of milk on the counter over night?!'
         'not me'
          'wasn't me either mom'
            'I didn't have milk'!
 Oh, Really?  it wasn't any of you? REALLY?!  Ok, well that seems Legit!  GHOST!  So we call him Marvin.  So now I say
     'Oh none of you left it out'
         'Well it must have been Marvin' 

Onto other news....Honestly there isn't other news.....Oh there is!  Me and the MIL are talking, AGAIN!  The BIL or the SIL still haven't tried and Honestly I don't know if I want to speak with them.  I know you are going WTF is she talking about!  Ok well I guess I will recap. 

     Me and the in laws, specifically the MIL, BIL, and SIL get into arguments quite often about random stuff.  The last one was about my daughter and a blog that I had up but is now taken down.   My MIL was very rude to my daughter one day.  I blogged about it and was hit with a brick, not literally but by email.  Now if you have read all of my blogs you will notice that I don't use names so if I did mention you in one of my blogs it isn't like anyone will know that I am speaking about you.  They asked me not to "pull them into our fights" and then blocked me from their Face book pages!  I didn't say your Name **** ****!  Even if I had come on it isn't like anyone reads this anyways, right!  So just to say they haven't spoken to me since before Memorial day last year!  WOOHOO!!! Like I could care!  I do have to say though I have been losing less hair now!

Sorry I am a little spazzy, I jump around alot!  Try and keep up it might get interesting!

Back to the house....I am going on strike!  I am playing sick now...maybe for the rest of the week, I don't know yet.  I just don't think that if I clean all day on one day you should be able to destroy it on another!

Ok well stay out of trouble and don't let the Zombies get you!  Peace out!

Mass Murderer, Zombies, or a Vampire!?

Ok well nothing has really happened here lately..Ok well the following did!

So last night me and Bear were home alone. I was REALLY bored and I happened to look out the window and I think I saw a shadow in the yard. I asked her "Hey is the door locked I think I just saw a person walk across the yard". She said "Nooo?" and I said "yea."   So she goes and locks the door. Then I say "Is the back door locked?" and she goes and locks the back door. This is what happened next... I SWEAR THIS IS A TRUE STORY!!!

I said "Oh gawd, what if they try and break in and they have a gun, then what!? Oh I know the dogs will get them, SHIT!  But they might shoot the dogs, damn than what?! Oh, OH, maybe grandma (MIL) will hear them shoot, and she will come and shoot at them! What if they shoot grandma!? Well, maybe they would have called 911 by then. We will still be dead by the time the cops show up though! DAMN!!

OH, OH, What if it is zombies!? OH I know we can sic the dogs on them and run out the back door. Oh Shit, what if they have us surrounded!?"  So Bear says "I have a baseball bat mom!"   "Okay! Good we can knock off their heads if they come after us. But we will have to leave the dogs behind because if they are bitten they become zombie dogs and zombie dogs are stupid! They will eat anything!  

Wait ya know if it is a vampire we are safe!"   Bear says "WHY!"   "Well because they can't get us if we stay in here because you have to invite a vampire in!"   PROBLEM SOLVED! 

(Update) I was told last night that I would still be screwed if it was a vampire because most vamps are HAWT and I would have been overcome with their HAWT-ness and invited them in........DAMN!

Now I swear that this really happened and when I told my husband about it he asked me if I was drunk or if I had been drinking.  Of Course I had not been drinking! DAMN!  But I really did see something!  I am still alive though :)  Have a great day y'all!  <3 all of you dearly!

HI

Hey you guys...I have decided to start writing in my blog again so I can keep y'all entertained!  yay!  Now don't get to excited because this isn't going to be an everyday thing may not even be a weekly thing, but I am here and I am writing.

I guess since I am starting this over again I will start off by telling you a little about me and my family!  Hi I am ~M~ or better known on Facebook as Psycho Bitch :).  I have a husband whom I lovingly refer to as Mert. We have 2 kids Bear my daughter who is so very close to being 15 and my sweet sweet son Bubba who is 11 going on 12 in June.  We have animals, oh do we have animals...we have 2 dogs Riley and Nash, a cat Calli, and 2 horses Max and Moonshine.  I have made it known that I would love to have another child in the future.  I probably won't but hey doesn't hurt to dream, right?!

Ok so let me tell you about my family. No not my kids and husband, how about my mom and her husband to start off :)  Your saying ok and, yeh well I love my mom dearly but I really hate dislike her husband strongly.  I have my reasons so lets list some of them shall we...

1. He is an ass
2. He is an indian giver (sorry don't know the correct term)
3. He literally took my home from me and my kids when I fell a month behind after us living there for over 6 years.
4. He sold the horse I was going to buy from him 2 weeks after I offered him $600 for only $350 :(
5. He lends his son $1800 for rent and doesn't ask for it back but I borrowed $50 for something and I had to pay it back the next week because he didn't have the money for gas!
Did I mention that he is an ass!
That is just a few things that he has done!

Ok well the following is what got me into trouble last time but lets try this again shall we...

The next paragraph is going to be about Merts family and the ups and downs of all of us. 

His family is something to cherish.  His Grandma is awsome. I love her to death, she is sweet, but speaks her mind.  She tries her best not to be hateful. That being said she misses her late husband alot and if you listen carefully you can hear her having conversations with him still every now and then.  His mom which is my MIL is a little (I believe) Bi-polar.  She says it is just menopause.  I think that she is a little twisted at times but hey who isn't.  I feel like she does stuff that she wants to do out of kindness but later when she wants something or if we get into a fight she will say "well I did _____ for you guys so you should do _______ for me"  ya know.  Her husband, Merts step-dad, is going looney, literally.  We all believe that he has either dimentia or alztimers.  Ha, his brother my EBIL thinks he is mr. high and mighty that can block people from Facebook whenever he gets pissed at you! PFFT WHAT THE F*** EVER. 

Ok so now that all of that is over you will know who in the hell I am talking about when I rant and vent about all things.  Oh BTW there will be cussing I will at times try and refrane but there will always be some.  Have a nice day and enjoy your kids.

Oh and if you haven't already go and like my Facebook Page
https://www.facebook.com/Somethintotalkabout?ref=hl  It is so worth it!