Showing posts with label hate. Show all posts
Showing posts with label hate. Show all posts

Saturday, October 18, 2014

Compassion, here? Pfft! Please...


There is so much that has been going on in my life that I have just now realized that I have been neglecting y’all.  I am so very sorry.  Well ok only kinda sorry.  I have a life too y’all. 

So I had a job at a domestic violence shelter and I loved it.  I got that job back in November of last year.  About  the same time I stopped writing y’all.  I really needed that job.  Don’t know if you all know this about me but I am a survivor of Domestic Violence and this job really hit home.  That is another story. 

 

Now seeing that I was working for a DV shelter I saw a lot of stuff and most of that is with the staff.  Yes there were times that a woman and her kids came in and I was beside myself upset about what had happened to them.  I can’t discuss that one; but the things that I am referring to is the fact that the staff there are horrible.  They don’t know how to treat people in general much less a woman that was being abused for god knows how long.  At times I wanted to scream at them that they are human too!!!   They thought that just because a woman didn’t do her chore on time she should potentially get a “write up” that might cause her to have to leave the shelter and possibly live on the street until she could find somewhere else to go.  That isn’t right, I don’t care who you are or what you are trying to prove.  Everyone needs a little sway every now and then.  That’s not to say that if you come in drunk or high and decide that you want to sit there and cuss me out or threaten me or my family with harm that I am not going to get you out of there as soon as I can; but if you come in drunk or high and go to your room to sleep it off and come to speak with me the next day about it I will let it slid the first time.  Everyone makes a mistake or two, we are all human.  Imagine how boring life would be if we all followed the rules all the time.   With all that said, and all that always happening, I stayed.  I stayed because they needed me.  They needed someone that was on their side in there, someone that would stand up for them in their time of need, someone that would stand there and listen when they needed it or give them advice if they wanted it or maybe just a hug.  Sometimes you just need a hug, or to cry, or scream, or maybe just laugh.  I wanted to know that at least they had someone. 

 

Before then, I had never contacted anyone outside of the shelter.  I was told that it wasn’t allowed and that I would lose my job.  Then I heard of one of the girls that I worked with inviting one of the clients to live with her for a while.  She still has her job and doesn’t do a damn thing to keep it.   The breaking point of all of it for me was when I was in Galveston, on September 22nd, and received a call that one of the ladies and her 3 kids; ages 2, 1, and 4 months; were kicked out because she had failed to complete her chore on time and was unable to call to let someone know because she had no phone with her.  She was asked to leave on Saturday before, and had been out since then.  That was it!  I asked the girl that had called me if the client had called since then.  No she had not called and no one has heard anything from her and no one has tried to call her either.  I didn’t bother asking her why no one has called her I just asked for her number.  A couple of minutes after that I called the client to make sure that she was ok and had a place to stay.  That is when she told me that in fact she and the kids had spent the last 2 nights in her truck and that she was going to be doing that again tonight, because when she left they had not given her any numbers for other shelters that she could call.  I was livid!!!  Why do they do this?!  How can they knowingly kick out a woman and her 3 babies and not give her at least a sheet of paper with numbers to other shelters!!!  That is the moment that I knew that I had to really start doing something actively to help these women or no one else would.  I took it upon myself to call around to other shelters and look for her another place to go.  I called 9 shelters that night and spoke to several others that were at the conference with me the next day.  It took me 2 days to find her a place to go.  That was 2 days that she slept in her car with her kids.  2 fucking days!!!!!  This could have been avoided if the shelter staff were a little more compassionate! 

 

So on October 7th right after a confidential staff meeting, I was called into the caseworker’s office.  I was then told that on September 29th I broke confidentiality when I contacted the client, and that I was being let go.  Yep, she told me that another staff member called her and told her that I had called the shelter to specifically ask for that clients number and take her food and diapers.  Then, as I was about to leave, the Executive Director, who was also in the room while I was being fired, stopped me and asked me if I would like to tell them anything or any names that have also broken the rules.  REALLY!!!  YOU WANT TO ASK ME THAT QUESTION AFTER YOU HAVE ALREADY FIRED ME!!!???  I looked her square in the face and said, “Why in the fuck would I tell you a fucking thing, it’s not like it is going to get me my job back!  Fuck y’all!” Pfft like I would tell them any motherfuckin thing!  So now that I have been fired, and don’t have a job, guess I can say whatever I want, right?  So I want someone to explain to me how one of the staff members that still has a job can have 2 CPS cases and has had a police report filed on her for “spanking” two kids in the daycare of the shelter.  How many asses do you have to kiss to keep your job after that one?  How about the staff member that verbally abuses the other staff members on her shift and makes the workplace hostile, or the one that yells and takes food from the children if they are caught eating after 9:30 in the morning?  I lost my job for helping a woman and her kids find a safe place to sleep.  I have so much more to say on this topic but it will have to be another day because Mert is looking at me wondering what is taking me so long…


<3 y’all and would love some feedback on this one.

Thursday, October 31, 2013

Oh he found you huh! F***** great!!

So how have y'all been? 
    Good?

Well I have a little something to say and I can tell ya that when I first found out I was beyond pissed. 

A while back I went to Ohio to visit a friend and my sister.  Well two days before I left my daughters biological father contacted her through her friend. 

To some of you, you're thinking well what is wrong with that?  I am going to tell you what the problem is.  He hasn't had anything to do with her since she was born.  At one point he made the comment that she wasn't his.  He left 2 months after she was born to be with someone that was 4 years younger than me.  I was 18 and he was 20.  Yea! 

So 2 days before I left he contacted her.  She of course didn't say anything to either me or her dad.  <----Mertis.  She let it go for quite a while.  Until well after I had gotten back.  She was calling and talking to him the whole time!  He has filled her head with all kinds of crap.  Like for instance; I have always wanted to meet you; or I pay child support; or your mom has kept you away from me (well that is kinda true but he is a dope head and I wanted nothing to do with him); or, and this is my favorite, let me tell you all of the things that your mom did when she was a teen. 

BASTARD!!!!!

HOW DARE YOU CONTACT THE CHILD THAT I HAVE RAISED FOR THE PAST 15 YEARS AND TELL HER LIES SO SHE MAY LIKE YOU!!!! THEN TURN THE TABLES AND MAKE IT SEEM LIKE YOU HAVE BEEN THE PERFECT PERSON AND THAT YOU HAVE PAID CHILD SUPPORT AND BEEN LOOKING FOR HER FOR THE PAST 15 FUCKING YEARS!!!!!  YOU HAVE NOT DONE ANY OF THAT!  I HAVEN'T SEEN A DIME FROM YOU IN I CAN'T EVEN REMEMBER HOW LONG.  YOU HAVE BEEN LOOKING FOR HER?  REALLY?  WELL MY GRANDMA HAS LIVED IN THE SAME HOUSE FR 30+ YEARS!  HAVE YOU GONE THERE LOOKING FOR HER?  NO ASS, YOU HAVEN'T!!!!

Pfft, please tell us all another lie.  I had to sit MY child down and explain to her the reason why she wasn't allowed to speak to your ass! 
         1. you are an addict that can't stay away from the drugs!
         2. you have failed to raise the other 6 kids that you have!
         3. you are a pathological liar!
         4. you are a worthless piece of trash that only looks out for himself!
         5. you have yet to keep a job!
         6. you are in jail more than you are out of it!

Damn I could go on and on and on!!!  Please find one of your other kids to try and love.  Stay the hell away from the one that I am almost done with!

I really hate the deadbeats that think that because she is 15, and she is so close to graduating from High School and moving on to college that you can just step back in and be "a part of her life" now!  Screw you!  She is the product of me and my husband knowing what love is and knowing how to show a child that love and support!  She is not a product of you and your lying cheating ways!  You are a worthless piece of trash that is to scared to contact me to talk to her!  Instead you have to drag two 15 year olds into your fucked up world! 

Being a parent is hard y'all.  

Tuesday, July 23, 2013

I am NOT sorry! Sorry

I am not really sure how to start this one.  I am really upset with this whole Zimmerman/Martin thing, but not in the way that you expect a person to be upset with it. 

I am upset that this has been made into a black and white thing.  It is not and was not a black and white thing. 

I am tired of Quenelle X saying that this was a racist thing.  How in the hell does he know that?  Was he there?  Oh, I forgot, everything with him is a racist thing! 

He stands there and talks about his family being slaves. Really, and when was that last year?  Ten years ago? 50 years ago?  Oh, you mean over 149 years ago!  Yea I can how that might still hurt you.  That must have been hard on you.  You know because some people that you don't know and have never known were slaves.  Oh and you know without a shadow of a doubt tha the slave driver was a white person because there is no such thing as a black slave driver.

I am what one of my best friends calls a "southern Belle".  I think it's cute.  When I tell people that I am a white woman from Texas, most of them think automatically that I am a Racist.  I am not a racist.  I am southern by blood/heart/mind/soul/and choice.  I say and do things that you may look at and go, oh she is so racist by saying that.  No y'all, that is just the way that I was raised and I will not change for you or anyone else! 

Please think before you say that someone is a racist.  It may sometimes seem that way but it may not always be true.

I read a blog this morning, it was about a man that was once a young man.  He was in college and it was late and raining and he pulled his hood over his head and walked across the campus with his head down so he could get to his dorm. 
      Now without me telling you his color, a security officer stopped him to ask him where he is going.  Instead of answering him he turned and asked him, why?  did I do something? 
      Why ask someone that is trying to keep a campus safe why they stopped you?  Just answer the question.  Here or There.  Real easy.  This boy is black, and seems to think that that officer stopped him because of his color.  I would not be able to tell what color someone is at night in the rain while they are wearing a hoodie.  Maybe, just maybe that officer could and that is why he stopped the only person out in the dark and pouring rain, because it was a black boy. 

Come on!  give me a break!  Really!?!?!  How stupid are you to think that the only reason that man stopped you was because you are black!!!  UGH!!!  I am sure that if it was a white woman he would have stopped her too because under a hoodie in the dark rain it is hard to see what color you are. 

I am just so over all of this and I needed to speak my mind.  Thanks for listening.

Monday, February 11, 2013

Am I wrong?

Hey, I missed y'all!  How are my people!?  All 1 of you HAHAHA!!!

Yea, OK we need to catch up a little...

I told you about the crazy horse girl down the street last time?  Well she struck again!  Yep!  I had to feed this morning, and I text her to let her know that I was feeding.  I texted her again to let her know that I was there and ready to feed.  I called and let her know that I wanted to feed before the storm, that I could see coming, started; and that I was going to feed my horses in 5 minutes if she didn't hurry.  She never showed up!  EVER!!!  Let me back up to Friday....

Mert and I fought.  He got pissed at me for something, whatever.  So he left to go and get him something to eat at around 6:30ish.  He gets back around 8ish and asks me if Erin had called (BTW that is crazy horse girl)  Nope, she didn't, why?  He tells me that he just saw them all leave with both trucks both trailers and all 4 of the 4-wheelers.  Huh, that's odd......

About 15-20 minutes later we get the following from Crazy horse girl..."Hey we r going be gone for the weekend garage door is unlock just lift up" word for word....

WTF!!!  I am not your animals keeper!!!!

We had been feeding her horses because they are in the same pasture as mine and I didn't think it would be fair to feed mine and not hers, when she isn't here.  That being said, they have been at his mom's house for the last week and don't come out to feed still.   So they assumed that we had nothing to do this weekend (which we didn't but still) and they TOLD us to basically feed their horses!  Sorry, who in the fuck do you think that you are talking too?!?!?!?  I don't get paid to babysit your animals!   

So that being said, that is why I did what I did this morning, and didn't feed her horses.  At that time because she would not answer me I didn't know if she was at his mom's or not.  It is not my job to keep track of her horses and vice versa.  She informed my 14 year old daughter yesterday that she was not going to allow her horses to eat the hay that we buy anymore.  Oh, really, OK, well I think you may have a problem because I will make sure that my horses have hay and you will pay me if you keep your horses in there, they will be eating that hay unless you sit next to it day and night to guard it.  FUCKING DUMB ASS!!!  I believe that I am doing the right thing by not letting her take advantage of me and my husbands generosity.  Am I wrong?

Wednesday, February 6, 2013

Fed up with BS

Ok so a little bit has happened since you have been gone.  I will start with my rant and work my way down.

Rant:  My uncles girlfriend is psycho.  No really I mean it she really is!  So my husband and I have only met this woman a couple of times.  Well when she started telling us all of every ones business we had met her once.  So Mert goes over there to finish something that he started and she comes out and starts talking to him again.  This time though it was about how J (my cousin) was trying to 'hook him up' with her husbands mom.  She then proceeded to tell MY husband that if he can date other people than she can too.  OK who in the hell cares!?  I don't and my MARRIED HUSBAND doesn't!  Why would you tell a married man that.  Mert says to me 'Meme I don't think that she is like that'  oh really?  Ok well I wasn't sure.  PFFT!  Bitch back the fuck up!  He is a married man, and if you know what is good for you, you will step the fuck off! 

Now my question for you is...am I wrong in being pissed off about it?

Rant #2:  Ok so we have horses.  You know this.  We have them in Mert's uncles pasture down the street.  They are in there with 2 other horses that are the neighbors'.  We feed everyday M-Sun without fail morning and night without their help because they don't live here.  That isn't my rant, nope I don't care about that.  Yesterday we were on our way to go and feed, were coming out of the driveway I see a horse in the ditch!  So.....I scream "HORSE OUT!  HORSE OUT!"  Then I see her (the owner)  she has let her horses out on a lead, to eat the grain in a bucket, that she brought down, in front of my 2 horses!   This pisses me off!!!!  Why would you do that?!  You don't feed your horses in front of mine, before I make it down there.  IT'S WRONG!!!!!  We don't do that to your horses, even though your mom in law can come and help us feed, but she doesn't!  WE feed your horses every damn day, and today because we are moving slow you want to get all impatient and take your horses out and feed them.  BITCH GO HOME!  Ok rant 2 done. 

Now on to a different matter.  My sister is prego!  yay!  We are hoping and praying for a girl!  Lots of pink and stuff!  Ok well enjoy your day.......

Friday, January 25, 2013

OH NO SHE DIDN'T

OMG!  I really can't believe this!

My husband, who works outside for folks, was at my uncles doing some work for him today, this is what followed.

    He goes up to get the check and his lady answers the door....ok I gotta say right here that she does nothing...nothing!  He asked her if she had the check and she told him no but to come in.  She proceeded to tell him all kinds of things that were not going to go any further than me (well and you) but still she had no right to discuss these things with him.

1. She said you know how J doesn't like me?  Well it is because she is on Meth, and she knows I know.  Her sister C goes and buys it for her.  Her husband says that if she doesn't quit then he will leave her.
   A.  How do you know this?  She doesn't even talk to you!  She hates you!  She says
         II.  Well because I rode with her husband somewhere for a job and he told me all of this, out of confidence of course.
   B.  WTF.  Do you know what that word means?  OMG

2.  You know how K didn't like me?  We we are on speaking terms now and her husband is cheating on her.  Not in the house, ya know, but he leaves for days and that is when he is with other women.
   A.  K tolerates you because of her dad.  That is all nothing more.  What type of shit are you trying to start telling my HUSBAND all of this?!  That also you should have kept in confidence! 

3.  C is being kicked out our her apartment unless she can come up with $1800 dollars.  She called again a couple of days ago and now it is $2400.  I know she is spending it on Heroin again with that POS of a boyfriend that says he is a gambler.  T went and gave her the money.
   A.  Who cares it is his money to spend the way he wants.

4.  You know when (said stuff) happened to S?
    A. Yea
          II.  Well I sent her the $5000 she needed out of my pocket, and I haven't asked for it back either
   B.  Good for you.

So this is just a small portion of what was said today!  What the heck am I supposed to do with this!?  OMG help!